I solemnly swear I am up to something.

A couple of weeks ago, I departed ways with the paranormal group I was associated with.  It was something that was a long time coming (I can trace it all the way back in July or maybe earlier, as that is when it all started to go wrong).

I don't care to talk about it, because it would cause the conversation to fall into that one thing I really hate: politics.  Usually someone maintains they are right while everything else is wrong.  God forbid someone disagrees.

It's an exercise on letting go and moving on.  So I have.  It's also a lesson about being a radiant soul.

...And that is the most important part of it.

In the past couple of weeks, I wouldn't say I've been busy, but I have been deep in thought.  Thinking about my motivations and interests and what worked in regards to what I did with the paranormal team and what didn't. 

I kept a mental list of it all and weighed it against one simple little question:  Am I happy?

It's a totally valid question.  I think most people forget to ask themselves that, let alone ask others.

In my little crusade within myself, the problem with unhappiness ends up with finding one's self wrapped and mired in controlling what is truly not to be constrained.  I am totally guilty of doing that myself.  The feeling of obligation and indebtedness gets in the way of feeling free of these constrains that bind us and buries us well into the ground.

If our souls are to become radiant they must do so in our own way.  You can't follow someone's guidance on it, it must be found through exploration and discovery.   The best you can do is be a mentor.  Be the reliable resource that's always there when it is needed.  But when the resource isn't needed, all a mentor needs to do is watch.  Watch and take joy in the progress that you'll witness.  Learn the lesson of the grass.  Doesn't really take much for it to grow, but it does require a little intervention here and there to keep it from getting out of control.

If anything, that's vaguely what I am up to.  I'm not saying anything more.  There is just so much for me to discover and explore on my own as it is.

And please try to be happy today.  That's all I ask.

Rebirth in sedona

The past week I went to Sedona Arizona for a vacation that's been a long time coming. 

I don't usually get to take my vacations mainly because of work's client demands.  Basically there's something new or important to take care of every single day.  Also when I go on vacation, that's when clients freak and do even more stuff.  My boss even says I can't take vacations.  I think he might be joking, but it's not funny.

The problem with not taking the time to break away from your job means you are a prime candidate for burnout.  Believe you me, when I say I was close to burnout, I was on the precipice of actually burning out.  The only way I could ever see myself taking a vacation was either due to a holiday or by having someone make me go.

Holidays don't count.

So my in-laws reserved us a place with a time-share in sedona.  They took care of lodging and the flights there and back.  The rest was up to us.  Hard to argue, right?

It turns out the timing was perfect. 

There is nothing that happens in my life lately without some kind of deliberate purpose behind it.  Yes, it doesn't make sense all of the time, and I may not fully grasp what is going on "behind the scenes".  The key for me right now is "go with it".

Okay.  Off we go.

Sedona is a bit underwhelming but at the same time overwhelming.  Sedona is not a big place.  It's a small town pretty much in the middle of nowhere.  The big thing about the place is something called a vortex.

NASA has identified 21 locations throughout the world where there is a lot of earth/spirit energy that presents itself in a strong manner.  5 of those locations are in Sedona. 

The day or two after we arrived in Sedona, it rained.  The place is basically an arid location, and we had rain.  This allowed us to attend a lecture by the non profit group freesoul's founder Pete Sanders.  Their website is freesoul.net.

Mr. Sanders really knows his stuff.  He explained what is going on with the vortexes (yes, that's how you say it, not vorticies) from a completely scientific perspective.  He talked about where we get our pain response and how to counter it, and how to get the best benefit from the vortexes.

The way it was described is that while a vortex deals with spirit energy, it is more of the assistance of one's own spirit energy from the earth itself.  I did have a recorder with me and turned it on at a location or two just to see if the energy is possibly spirit energy and is able to communicate.

The entire place is a metaphysical mishmash of crystal shops and psychic readers contrasted with the appeal of mountain vistas and scenic destinations. That in mind, we did find the time to go to 5 locations of vortex like activity with 4 of them recognized as vortex hotspots.

The first one is not considered one of the major vortexes, but it is chapel rock.  Chapel rock is a chapel designed in part by famous architect Frank Lloyd Wright.  It's a very small chapel that overlooks a large portion of the valley.  It's precariously perched on a hill and takes a bit of a walk to get to the chapel.  This location is an upflow vortex. 

An upflow vortex is one that energy is pushed upward.  Imagine it as if it's a rocket sending your prayers/spirit straight upward.  By contrast is an inflow vortex.  It gives the sensation of pulling you downwards and usually causes introspection.  A combination of the two is a balance vortex.  A balanced vortex is as if the energy flows in a lateral manner.  Balanced vortexes will give someone a sense of well being as well as deal with issues in the past and future.

The second location we went to was Airport vista.  There's actually two vortexes at the location, but the main one is the rightmost hill of the tiny little parking area.  This one is the easiest of the hills to climb in my opinion.  It also doesn't disappoint when it comes to feeling the energy. 

I know most people think bell rock is the strongest.  We went to that one next.  The problem in climbing bell rock is that you really need to be nimble and fit in order to get to the upper levels of bell rock.  There's a 3 foot step up that you have to make and the climb up a tapered rock.  To us this was a bit beyond our abilities as we wanted to attempt.  The danger of it, is that if you don't place your feet correctly, the fall is quite a number of feet away.  We just weren't that daring.  The energy was supposed to be stronger there than airport, but I did not feel it as strongly.

The next vortex we went to was red rock crossing.  This is a state park and the entire path is along a mountain river.  This is probably the easiest one to reach, due to it's flat terrain. The vortex supposedly is in an area that is represented by a large area of flat rock.  We however, felt the energy was located earlier on the path, as we could feel our internal organs getting pulled toward the ground.

The last place we went to was boynton canyon.  That one is a bit of a combination and was when I really started to feel something.  To me it felt like a data stream.  A lot of encrypted imagery combined with the sense that it's "all part of the plan".  Yes, I do hear Heath Ledger say it as the joker.

We tried to go to a vortex on 11/11/11 but everyone had the same idea.  It was a bit nuts.  Instead we ended up checking out montezuma's well and castle.  The surrounding area of Sedona is besprinkled with these little native communities all of which disappeared around the same time.  (1400's)  All that's left of them are these ruins or crumbling house structures.

We also took the opportunity to take in a site of spectacular petroglyphs at the former v bar v ranch.  These glyphs are etched into the flat side of a hill.  The bacteria formed on the rock makes it possible to see these etchings.  There are a lot of them, and you can spend a considerable amount of time there thanks to the volunteer storyteller that makes them all the more captivating.  There were bugs there, so we found it a little annoying.

Before leaving Sedona, we took one more hike up airport rock to see the sunrise over the area.  This was probably the biggest thing that happened to me during the whole trip.

I am sitting there with my eyes closed just relaxing as the sun is slowly coming up over the eastern mesas, and something large shoots upwards in my vision.  It's literally a dragon.  Large scales on its neck and much bigger than a house.  This was the reason I was there.  To experience this rush of energy and to become energized and inspired by it.  That is exactly what I needed.  After soaring around through waterfalls of lava and fire, it took me to a lateral perspective of the rock upon which I was sitting.  I was shown the energy moving around the rock.  At one level, the energy spins one direction and at another it spun a completely different direction.  The energy I was experiencing was pushed through the center of these rotating fields of energy. 

As I opened my eyes, I had a sense of direction, better motivation.  If I imagine that dragon flowing through me, I find the relaxation of soaring on the wind.  I also feel a force behind me, imbuing me with a sense of confidence and a voice driven with a passionate fire. 

If there was ever a reason for me to get a tattoo, this is IT!!!  The imagery, inspiration and motivation of such a moving experience is something I want to hold onto for a very long time.

The world feels a lot better to me because of it and I think my place in the world is a lot better from that as well.

When will paranormal audio catch up with the visual?

It was the season ending episode of Paranormal Challenge and it was evidence review time and the evidence was being shown that I really had to create this rant.

The problem I see with any paranormal evidence has to be with consistency.  For example, it's now a foregone conclusion that chances are that there aren't any orbs on a picture.  99.999% those round things are either dust or bugs.  No way around that.  The sampling rates of the pictures will no doubt cause people to think there is a person's face or something like that in a picture.  In those cases it's called "matrixing" and is considered a think with your mind and not a piece of evidence.

Now, the question I have, is why aren't these concepts translated to audio evidence?  Since joining a paranormal group with a legacy of prolific EVP generation, I do question the validity of two devices.  The first being the notorious spirit box or sometimes called Frank's box.  The other is a device called the ovilus.

Frank's box (named after its creator Frank Sumption) is pretty much a radio set to continuously scan the radio dial.  The so named Shack Hack as it's made from a radio shack radio literally is a radio with the scanner set to not identify when it's hit a station.  Occasionally you'll hear little verbal bloops and bleeps, but supporters of it claim that a voice can come across several stations and say a short message.  This is fraught with problems.  First is that the message is subject to interpretation.  The second is that it's completely possible that a close station tower will broadcast across several positions on the dial.

Just like with "matrixing" there is a version of "audio matrixing" which means that a nonsensical part of a word will appear to sound like what you're expecting to hear.  Or you're hearing a phrase from a radio station and mistaking it for a spirit voice.

The ovilus is a rather unique device but it too is fraught with problems.  The idea of the ovilus is that a spirit can use temperature changes and emf fields to select words from the ovilus dictionary and relay them through the device.  The problem here, is that it's not practical in a investigative sense.

First the spirit isn't going to be up to speed on the ovilus.  The best you can hope for is that the spirit trips across the words its looking for at some ease.  Only with long sessions with the ovilus could one hope the spirit becomes adept enough to be coherent. 

The part where it all falls apart for me, is that EVERYONE (and I do mean that literally, as I have done it as well) is always repeating what's being said from these items.  Either they aren't sure they heard it correctly, or they just heard it wrong.  Whichever reason it is, it would be difficult for a spirit to confirm whether the statement is correct.  For the ovilus, if it's not clear, it's lucky you got the word in the first place.  With the franks box, it's a matter of being out of the frequency range following the message.

I do want to point out that early versions of the ovilus do not have a word display on the device, so even then the electronic voice can be misinterpreted.

I think that if there's any question about the validity of a piece of evidence, then that evidence must be thrown out.  Asking questions to confirm ovilus/box audio seems to fall under this guideline. 

So I guess that comes down to the big question:  Should audio retrieved from a Frank's/spirit box or an Ovilus be considered evidence?

I would totally say it isn't.  It's no more evidence than dots on a photo and saying that they are spirit orbs.

Now I am not going to completely rule out the Ovilus for paranormal research, but the device has to be in use for quite a period of time in order to be usable by the spirits at the location.  In team research this is a significant amount of time and can take days in order for a spirit to be coherent.

That being said, I do want to take a parting shot at the show Paranormal Challenge.  In the Jerome Grand Hotel season ending episode, we are told that medium Chris Fleming would help the team for 30 minutes.

However, the helping was to play a spirit box for 30 minutes.

I thought Fleming was a medium.  What is he doing with a spirit box?  Shouldn't he be pointing and saying go here, go there and that's where the teams would be getting evidence?  However, in looking at the wikipedia article, it's clearer that he's not a medium. 

To me, a medium sees, and communicates directly with spirits.  Any one who requires a device to do so... is not... ever... at all... even close to being a medium!

Calling yourself a medium when you're not, or portraying evidence when there is none, is just basically a form of lying.  You're lying to clients, you're lying to the innocent who don't know better and you're lying to yourself. 

I've seen spirits, I can sense spirit energy, and I get EVP's in my own NOT HAUNTED office, but you will NEVER hear ME calling myself a medium or psychic.  I'm not delusional like that.  I've been called sensitive, but believe you me, when I say that right now, it will give you a stern look. 

I just want the crapfest that is staining the paranormal world to stop.  Stop trying to say you've got evidence when you don't.  Stop saying you've got abilities when you don't.  Stop saying you're the best, especially when you aren't.  Karma is a rabid bitch, and she's in heat.

IT STOPS NOW!

The book of desires and the book of destiny.

I had recently been told that this idea I was working on was a good idea. I have been calling it the book of desires until most recently that I found out that it is also the book of destiny.

The whole thing stems from the concept of the "Law of Attraction". This is one of the most guiding laws guarding the spiritual reality we live in. Since learning about that law, I have identified at least 5 of these laws. We will address two of the other laws. That being "The Law of One" and the "Law of Letting Go".

The law of one talks about the interactivity between all of humanity. Scientists call it quantum entanglement. The bible calls humanity the children of God. To put it simply, we can see ourselves as Creators as we come from the Creator. It's just as if you get a glass of water from the faucet and instead of seeing it as a glass of water that you recognize it as coming from the ocean.

The law of attraction says that as a creator, the thoughts that you put into your existence eventually becomes reality. The law of letting go is that your thoughts will manifest much more easily when you accept that this is the reality you are creating.

I have developed a way to accomplish these things with a set of simple steps. If this seems too impossible, I only point back to the law of letting go and the practical application that says "just go with it".

1) To begin, you will need a spiral notebook. Any simple notebook will do. You need to be able to write on the cover and be able to tear pages from the book.

2) On the cover you write the following:
OPEN ONLY WITH A HEART OF GLADNESS AND GRATITUDE!

Write it with a huge sharpie. Underline every word. Write it as deliberately as possible so that every time you look at the book you see these words as clear as possible.

3) Underneath it, write your name. As large as you want.

4) On the inside write:
WHAT DOES YOUR HEART DESIRE!

It's not a question mark, because it's a demand. Demand only what you are desiring. Underline those words as well.

These are the only requirements to begin.

Once you can say you have a heart of Gladness and Gratitude, then you can open the book. Read the demand asking for your heart's desire.

Then on the first page, 5) write what your desire is.

Is it to lose weight? Is it for money? Is it a job? Write it down.

I do want to point out that how you say it is very important. One thing the law of attraction does not recognize is negatives. So by saying you want to "lose weight", you send out the idea of "weight". Instead think of being "thin". This is a more accurate state of where you want to be, because once the idea is manifested, what you are, is "thin" and not containing "weight". Don't say debt, say affluence.

Secondly, it helps to be specific. You want money, how much? You want a car, what color is it? What make, model, mileage?

You have the entire page (front and back) to detail this.

If you have other desires, place them in there as well. Each one gets their own page.

I should note that wanting something is not the same thing as desiring it. Sometimes manifesting a want for something only gives you the desire to "want". That's not the same thing as actually having it.

This is similar to a dream board, but I do say, that the book is really up to you. You have a cutout picture you want to go in there, do it! You are the creator here, and it's up to you to place what you want on your intention.

If ever your desire manifest then feel free to remove the page. Just tear it out.

I thought that by placing your desires in the book that it would be called the book of desires. That may be true, but it's what the intended goal, that really is what the book is about. So by creating and manifesting desires, you have created a book that details your destiny. It's where you are going. It is what you desire.

Now the book will take time to go from desire to manifestation. Think of it like planting a seed. You rarely will see a seed germinate immediately.

And just like planting a seed, just having a seed isn't the same as planting it. By placing your desires into the book, trust that it will manifest and it will manifest on its own. Occasionally a desire may need you to perform an action. This should happen as a course of natural progress.

Take the "thin" intention. Maybe you have a strong urge to take a walk. Well, then that's exactly what you do. Maybe it causes you to not get the large steak or burger the next time at the restaurant, but it's rather that the salad just screams out at you. It's like a roller coaster that all you have to do is get on it. You can't steer it, you just gotta let go and follow the ride as it tosses you from one turn to another.

Occasionally you'll look at the book. Once in the right place in your heart, you can look at your intentions. See how it is going. See where you are in relation to your original intention.

The book is yours. You can share it or not. You are the creator here.

Be realistic. If you desire a million dollars, know why you need all of that money. Sometimes it is more realistic to have enough to eliminate all of your debts.

If you have doubts, start with something that would seem more achievable. And by all means, be patient. There's more than enough time for the things to manifest. As long as you have the heart of Gladness and Gratitude, you will find the manifestations happening faster and faster.

With the things coming true, take that moment to laugh at that doubt you used to have and how it is replaced with the joy that sits at the root of your desires.

The book is a tool to help with understanding of who we really are. Once we know who we are, we are liberated enough to experience the rapturous bliss that is the ecstatic existence in which we are living.

And then laugh again, because that's how good you feel.

Have Dowsing Rods, will try to listen.

So I decided to start paying more and more attention to the ringing in my ears and pulling out my hand-made dowsing rods to see why my ears are ringing.

In 3 days I have had 5 spirits visiting me.

I'd probably have more, but if I respond to every one of them, I would exhaust myself in no time.

One concerning one was a little two year old girl that came through. She was lost and didn't know where her mommy was. She didn't know what year it was or anything like that. She was just too young. I only hope the guides that are with me in the journey called life were able to get her where she needs to be.

The rest were family members who have passed on. They come by and say Hi and stuff and I did pull out my recorder for one of them. Now I don't normally get a lot of EVP's, but then I never started fitting the pieces of the puzzle that is me together.

That is until now.

So I normally get a loud ringing in the ears. It's really high pitched, and it kind of resembles tinnitus. However, tinnitus is more like the ringing you get after being at a really loud concert. Don't get me wrong, but I know the difference. Frankly, they don't even sound the same to me. Tinnitus is more of a dull "wah", where the ringing I get is a "zing" type of sound.

The other thing that's been progressing is tiny little pin pricks of light in my visual field. They don't happen all that often, but when they do, they usually are pointing out something. Lately, I have started to pay more attention to them. Maybe there's something to them or there's an intelligence behind them.

Well, there is. Not sure how to explain it, but it's really pointing out something I am supposed to be seeing. Whether it's pointing out the crucial concept to a part of text or the direction of where I need to be going, these things just occasionally pop into existence in my field of view and then just as quickly they disappear.

So I am sitting at my work station doing my job and then the ringing starts in really strong. I mean it's like a teacher's bell in how loud it is. Anyway, I quickly grab my rods and speak out loud "is anyone here?" The rods normally don't respond all that quickly for me, except when they are getting manipulated by a spirit. They crossed as if there was a huge magnet sitting underneath them. If it made a sound, I bet "thoom" might be closest to it.

Sure enough I had a spirit. A relative actually who just popped in on an occasional visit to say "hi". I actually got him on a recording, which makes it all the more incredible.

Then later in the week, I catch a blip of light on the computer monitors. Mind you I stare at computer monitors for a good 9 or so hours a day, so something out of the ordinary, I am definitely going to see. Anyway, I kind of saw a face as a part of the light and so I grabbed the rods. Hey, what do you know, another relative!

I am getting pretty good at this!

So then I hear a ringing. Ah, pull out the rods again....

Oh, wait. You're not a family member? You're a 2 year old girl?!? You're lost? That's so sad!

This can't possibly be an easy way to live. I mean, if I responded to every little ringing in my ears, I would never get anything done. Quite literally so.

What's even harder for me is that I have to communicate through dowsing rods. Not an easy way of doing it, as it's basically 20 questions for every little piece of information.

It would be really nice if I could just bypass the whole dowsing rod thing and be able to converse on a one to one basis, but that's the problem I face with myself.

Hey, at least I know the ringing isn't just me going crazy... or is it?

Maybe the whole dowsing rod thing is just muscle reactions toward a question? I know that's not completely inconceivable.

I hear the ringing again and again, which either means someone wants to converse with me or that I really need to do something.

It's so hard that it's not so clear.

Using a minimal theremin for ghost hunting.

On 6/26/2011, the paranormal group I am with went on a ghost hunt and it gave me time to test out the response from using a minimum theremin in detecting spirit energy.

The minimum theremin is a theremin with the volume controls absent from the circuit. This means that all signals come out at the same level.

This is similar to the Mel meter with EMF radiating antenna. This is the Mel-8704REM device.

In observing the Mel-8704REM in field situations I feel certain that the range of the minimum theremin that I am using is at least twice as large of a radiating field that the mel meter. I am getting radiating ranges around and above 12 inches from the antenna.

This presented a problem in holding the device, so I hacked together a solution so the theremin is held well away from the body.

I am in the middle of testing, but I can say that the device works really well.

Instance number one was a bit difficult, as the spirits were showing a hesitation in touching the antenna of the unit. One spirit in particular said it looked like a sword. Yes, the device is a bit unusual and the antenna is a shiny silver, but it does take a lot of convincing that the antenna is harmless. Spirits that are not as timid are more likely to be friendly and tend to feel comfortable with the device.

A child was reported going near the unit, at which I did receive a small sound. However, the unit was close to my body, so I couldn't readily confirm a hit.

The second instance was a communication session with several spirits. At the point where one spirit attached to one of the other team members, I was standing in the range of 4-5 feet away from the member and I had strong readings from the unit right in the middle of the ambient space.

The unit is not too particular about what objects it will detect as the tombstones in the cemetery were triggering the unit.

In the final test of the unit for the day, I handed the unit over to the group founder/leader and the unit did receive another hit in the middle of ambient space. The hit was fairly quick which actually adds a bit of credence to the device.

What works best with the unit is that it does not move quickly through the environment. It has a tendency to pick up things over time much better than instantly grabbing energies in the area.

I am currently using a headphone amplifier to get signals from the theremin. This will eventually be output to a speaker, so the audio may be picked up on recorders.

I will post more data when it becomes available.

I don't get people

OR is humanity good or are we evil?

Growing up in a very fundamentalist view of Christianity, what I understand is that we all have this sin nature from the beginning with Adam and Eve. So Jesus comes along and says that he will be the sacrificial lamb for all of our sins and that it's all taken care of.

Or is it?

I am constantly struggling with people over the concept that we aren't bound to an old way of thinking, even though it is about 2000 years ago when it changed.

The problem is this. Why are we perceiving ourselves as evil when we are trying to go somewhere because we are good?

This is very confusing, because in order to see yourself as good you have to be evil? That means that we are evil and not good in our natural state.

What is our natural state?

I postulate this, that we are only considered as good or evil because we want for there to be opposites instead of just accepting things as they really are. It's like saying that there is an opposite to something as benign as a crayon or rocket.

It's not like there's a anti-crayon or anti-rocket, but that dichotomy seems ingrained in our psyche that we have to have it. The truth is more likely that we don't need to follow such a dichotomy.

If we are evil, then we can justify the things that tear us apart and cause us to fight against each other. That doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but in our struggling to be good, we are doing just that.

There is no good or evil just as much as what we perceive as our orientation in the whole universe as up and down. Maybe we're sideways in the universe and we haven't figured that bit out yet.

We just want it to be up and down because it gives us a sense of accomplishment. It's an accomplishment that only polarizes and suppresses our ability to grow beyond our ways of thinking.

Over 1500 years after Christ did we even think that maybe earth isn't the center of the universe or is even flat for that matter.

Once we get past these primitive notions, can we generate progress. We can better ourselves and the people around us.

We can stop living a painful life in hope of a blissful one by realizing that in attempting to have one, that it places you in the opposite. That's what happens when you create a polarity, in attempting to be something you literally have to be that which you attempt to not be.

An example is that someone who wants a pain free existence lives in a place of pain. Another is that a person who wants to be rich lives a poor existence.

The only safe place to be is somewhere in the center and balanced between the two polarities. Only there can you achieve the goal you thought you were trying for and realizing that it's not a polarity, but a position of being.

I don't get people, because I know now that I don't have to get them. They are just as they are and just as I am.

This is where reality shifts, because after all, it's a matter of perception. Do we perceive a world ruled by polarized states? Do we leave these flat earth concepts behind us to embrace a non polarized state where we live not in harmony or discord, but rather to hear the single voice of a united people?

Is there even an answer to a rhetorical question?